Tassy

I don't know what it is about traveling that entices me so much! Sadly to my disappointment and frustration I have not travelled much. Well, there are excuses galore that I can offer.

Anyway, the traveling style I adore and feverishly wish to try is of the most unsophisticated nature. Quite literally nature is all I want on every ride, at every stop, for every click, for every drop of sweat. Give me a day in a forest full of tall trees, chirping birds and green ferns and you will never see a frown on my face. Let me hike mountains and you will see my gratitude spike. Gosh! What is it about waterfalls that leaves me drenched in awe and child like excitement? I don't seek exotic resorts or party minded people for company. Just one delightful company if possible, else I, me and myself will do, thanks!

Travelling is a glorified act these days. Globe trotters are in abundance and they don't shy away from letting the world know how far and wide they travel, thanks to technology. I love to read about people who travel a lot. What I try to figure out from their travel stories is, What do they seek out of this process? What drives these people to travel? Where do they travel? What do they learn? Whom do they meet? What do they see?

For me, personally, the very activity of travelling is yet again quite literally the process of travelling through my own self. Understanding my inhibitions, acknowledging my fears, raising my strength and propelling my perseverance. For me, time with nature is as soulful as I can let my soul feel. Amidst nature I feel there is pure joy in feeling small, immense gratification in feeling mortal, knowing serendipity in pure serenity and sensing the simplicity of speaking in silence. Simply put, amidst nature I feel an outpouring of being me, feeling free, clenching calmness and feeling proudly peaceful.

Here are a few pictures from my most recent travel to this beautiful island called Tasmania. We spent four delightful days in Hobart and I got my much needed dose of date with nature.

It's time

Now it's time, I feel, to open my eyes and awaken the desire behind my dream

Now it's time, I feel,to let my sense of adventure tease my mystic mind and humble heart

Now it's time,I feel, to love with such frevor that it makes me want to freeze every intimate moment 

Now it's time, I feel, to pick all the little things that matter,just like delicious cherries from the farm of life

Now it's time, I feel, to challenge my self to climb that mountain, to stand on top and to soak up in the beauty of nature 

Now it's time, I feel, to sweat it out to a pristine waterfall, to stand underneath it,barefoot and bare soul

Now it's time, I feel, to not shutdown when I am misunderstood, but to smile and simply explain and express

Now it's time, I feel, to action the art of loving by just giving it, and let this love make me laugh, cry and feel ecstatic

Now it's time, I feel, to speak in silence, not when I am hurt or scared,but when my heart is overwhelmed when it's fondly nurtured  

Now it's time, I feel, to clasp your hands and to talk while we walk, smiling every mile, feeling blessed for the bond we share

Now it's time, I feel, that you show up and we make up and this sudden sense of angst, of aging, of losing hope, of dying every living moment, all just dries up. 

Eternal Longing

Just another day, she thought. So ordinary, so normal it felt

Just another meeting, she thought. So abuzz, so usual it felt

Just another face, she thought. So many around, so crowded it felt

Just another cuppa, she thought. So to the brim, so hot it felt

Just another stare, she thought. But so transfixed, so enigmatic it felt

Just another moment, she thought. But so rare, so crazy it felt

Just another smile, she thought. But so shy, so silly she felt

Just another conversation, she thought. But so loved, so comfortable she felt

Just another soul, she thought. But so connected, so drawn to it she felt

Just another night, she thought. But so eager, so awake she felt

Just another feeling, she thought. But so blessed, so sorry she felt

Just another desire, she thought. But so elusive, so helpless she felt

Just another of life’s teaser, she thought. But so sad, so agitated she felt

Just another memory, she thought. But so wishful, so hopeful she felt

Life's Strife

Here, they say 'be yourself'

and when you gather your guts to give it a try

a hundred thoughts and a hundred people can make you cry

even before you try, you begin to ask why

Here, they say 'take the road less travelled'

This seems to be the glorified thing to do

You travel the realms of reality and reach peaks of practicality

Struggling to rather make your road the best travelled

Here, they say 'have no regrets'

and you wonder, how can that be

when I am given this, I think about that

and when I am here, I cannot be there, right?

Here they say 'be the change you wish to see'

In this pursuit, what you grew up believing seems no longer true

this shakes your confidence and you begin to feel the blues

But, things change, people change and you grapple each day changing for change

Here, they say 'have fun'

Many rules are not to be shunned

You are told, 'Don't do this', 'Never go there'

Agitation urges you to run, but you don't know where

Here, they say 'be positive'

Let go your past, have faith in your present

pin hope in your future, pretty please

After all it is in your blood to B+

Do you know what lies in between

The here and there

The past and present

The ifs' and buts'

The yes and No....

your life!, simple isn’t it?

Living in the “Mom”ent

 

Do you know what this means? How is feels? How to do it? Why do it?

 

I do not, yet...but I am trying.

 

I say 'trying' because I live in a world that drives me crazy....

 

There always seems to be chores to do, one after the other

Cut throat timelines that relentlessly bother

 

The mind always feels rushed

The poor heart is always hushed

 

‘I am busy’, ‘I have no time’ is said all too often

Too busy to live, too busy to soften

 

So many moments we miss in a day

Thanks to the notorious routine that takes us away

 

Feeling peace, feeling quite

No longer feels normal or right

 

In a race, always focused on your pace

No grace left to feel the sunshine on your face

 

To find the balance between work and home, we take so long

You feel agitated all along, only to realise you may have just got it all wrong

 

Alas, you cannot walk away from what needs to be done

It is after all important to earn and eat some bun and have some fun

 

To be able to do this you sure do need money

And earning this is not always fun, honey

 

But amidst this madness that you barely seem to cope

Everyday living sprinkles us with moments that are full of hope

 

Moments when your child is busy playing and randomly says ‘I love you’

And you flash a smile and feel blessed for this being-loved cue

 

Moments when you watch the colour of your child’s eyes in the sunshine

And in them you see the simple and innocent soul shining like a goldmine

 

Moments when your child giggles over your silly act

You feel glad you initiated this enticing laughter with such simple tact

 

Moments when bed time leads to insightful talk times and delightful story times

And ends with cuddles and feeling mesmerised on hearing each others’ heart chime

 

Moments when your mind is not elsewhere and your eyes are not on your phone

but it is instead focused on your child, the joy and the confidence they feel is clearly shown

 

Moments when you watch your child so utterly focused on a painting task

With their eyebrows in a frown and lips in a pout, to watch this cuteness you simply bask

 

Moments like these are within your reach

To live in these moments and to express the love you feel, they teach

 

A long day you might have had, your to-do-list looks equally bad

To not recognise these moments that will surely make you glad is indeed very sad

 

When you have said ‘Hurry up’ and instantly bite your tongue out of guilt

Then this guilt is a good sign that your focus on life has a new tilt

 

Why all this fuss about missing moments you may wonder

About life when you ponder, these missed moments will have the answers to your blunder

 

Your touch, your attention, your smile, your calmness, your encouragement play a vital role

To raise a loved child, moments like these bear the ultimate goal

 

On most days you are granted this wish but some days some moments you may miss

Don’t beat yourself for this, your child will always remember your kiss

 

So, regret not about the moments you have lost,  worry not how, and ask not why

No matter how much you try, money can never buy these moments even if your try

 

If you think you see a moment, stop your clock chasing mind

Follow your heart, the soulful secret to living in the moment, you will surely find

EOD Routine

“I want 5 books (to be read) tonight mummy” declares Mr 3.9

I say 'First lets brush your teeth'

“Three books, ok? But I brush my teeth tomorrow morning, ok?” comes the negotiating reply.

I repeat the same thing (every night) about sugar bugs eating away his teeth while he is sleeping. (The days I am lazy to help him with brushing, the sugar bugs are on a holiday and his teeth safe for the night)

“Three books, ok? But only brushing no cleaning tongue, ok? he negotiates again.

My ‘OK’ has to sound like he won a good deal for himself. (3 books is still a good deal.)

I negotiate for 2 books. An instant and suddenly teary “You are always naughty mummy!” reply seals my failed negotiation

Every single night I attempt to skip a page, I get told off for missing a page.

I read fast, I am asked to slow down.

I yawn and sheepishly skip a few lines, I am asked to repeat the page

The joy of snapping a book close after the last word, is all mine!



The Mad mummy (in me) is counting every second of sleep he is missing out on and calculating how late he will wake up the next day!

The Good mummy (in me) is thinking she is reading to her child every day as recommended and that her child actually loves to be read to, yippie!

The Angry mummy (in me) is wondering why the same book every day? Keep me motivated, dude!

The Happy mummy (in me) is wrapped by the smile, hug and kiss after a reading session that leaves her little man satisfied!

I feel the love on Valentine's Day

My dear FIL,

Can I begin by saying that there has not been a single day that I have not thought about you and not wished that you were still here with us? You were a man of great character and principal. I was always in search of a mentor like you to guide me through this rock and roll journey called LIFE.Just almost when I began to realise that I could learn some really good tricks of the trade from you to combat life, destiny dealt her cards and took you away.

Now, I can't ever put in words how grateful I am that your death was so fast and graceful, if I may say.My deepest and strongest wish now that I feel too tired and old on some days is to have an end like you did.
A way to a man's heart, they may say, is through his stomach. But surely a way to my heart is simply through my heart. We all have different shades to our personality. Different people see different shades. Different people like different shades.I too saw different shades in you. One as father to his DIL and the other as a grandfather to my son.The way our minds and hearts work, the former shade felt like a growing seedling...a growth that I slowly began to realise and relish. The latter shade, I simply saw without doubt, straightaway - from day one.. and this is the shade that found its way- straight into my heart, so effortlessly.
I feel robbed of all the valuable learning's that I could have pocketed and I feel so utterly robbed for my son since the relationship that you two shared was so abruptly cut short.The bond that I saw growing between the two of you was love and affection in its purest form personified.Well, as I say the way our minds and hearts work, such a bond brought such great sense of joy and warmth and assurance that a tinge of envy I could not avoid. Envy that my little man had such a blast in your company more so than mine.
Along with you seems to have gone that sense of confidence in parenting that I was just beginning to discover.

What I have today, I try to believe is like a present wrapped in lifes' ifs and buts.I can see my present only if I unwrap and put aside the ifs and buts. And what I find is my present packed with memories we created that are so fond and just as beautiful as our bond....