THE GAP

 

A sunny day, a long weekend and a lush green growth of weeds in the backyard.

 

She tied her hair in a bun, rolled up her sleeves, pulled up her pants and looked for the pair of soiled garden gloves. They were large for her hands but she used them anyway. She picked the corner of the garden which had a small sand pit on the ground that was her kids’ play area. This could as well be a mine field given the kids always hid all sorts of stuff in the sand. She was amazed at the relentless weeds, they even spit themselves out of beach sand!

 

She carefully climbed on the top of the sand pit onto the retention wall which housed the healthy patch of weeds. Long hedging plants grew on either side of this unused patch. The weeds were quite thick at the base of the shared wooden fence. A huge double storey house stood on the other side of the fence. Some recent garden work in her neighbour’s house had left a gap in the fence. She had occasionally heard the neighbours but had never seen them. If they had walked past her on the street, she would not have a clue!

 

She was very alert as she began plucking the weeds from the far-right side. It was the exact place where a gorgeous blue tongue lizard was spotted by her husband which he mistook to be a snake! But secretly the prospect of a snake in her garden excited her. She loved watching and spotting animals, birds and insects. Their unglamorous and simplistic life appealed deeply to her.

 

Squatting and with her head down she was utterly focused and methodical in plucking the weeds whilst he was silently peeping through the gap in the fence. Not a sound. It was almost like he did not want to startle her. After all she had no clue who all lived on the other side of the fence. She lifted her head and stood up straight to ease the strain on her back. Looking away from the fence towards the garden bin standing a meter away she aimed the bunch of weeds in her hand at the bin. Most of it made it in. She wiped her face right across with her forearm to clear the hair from her face. Looking down, she moved closer to the gap in the fence and squatted again ferociously plucking the heavy growth at the base of the fence. His presence was so still. It seemed like he had turned himself into a statue with his gaze fixed on her and her gaze fixed on the weeds. She inched right in front of the gap and in an instant dropped the weeds she was holding and almost lost balance and barely saved herself from falling to the sand pit. Her legs were shaking and her heart was racing. She quickly got down feeling wobbly and shocked. She stood at a safe distance and danced her neck to peak through the gap. She certainly saw those beautiful brown eyes that glistened in the sun. She had not the slightest clue he lived in that house. She was surprised she had not heard him in the four years that she lived in her house. She waited for him to reappear. She was curious now. She wanted another good look at him. Shock and surprise turned to smile and anticipation. Still no sign of what looked like the cutest face. Maybe she startled him too. She quickly corrected herself to be as calm and composed as him, luring him to peak back. She was keen to say hello and strike a conversation. Know thy neighbour, after all. He did not return, but her curiosity stayed.

 

The next day she was in her balcony overlooking her front yard. She saw a young family walk past. “That’s him!”, she exclaimed with excitement. She raced down planning to say hello in case the family walked back the same way. She again took to removing the weeds from around the letter box being silly and superstitious that somehow plucking weeds would make them meet again. He did not return, but her hope stayed.

 

A few days later she went back to the sand pit area, stood at a distance and looked through the gap in the fence, looking with more attention this time. She spotted a few toys on the ground. She imagined playing with him. Just a momentary glance at those beautiful brown eyes and she felt all consumed by him. Wanting to meet him again became a secret mission.

She had a few tricks up her sleeve. She tried them one by one. She coughed and paused. No sign of him. She made a few noises and paused. No sign. She rustled the branches of the hedging plants, still nothing. She whistled gently and paused. Fourth time lucky! He appeared, looked quite and curious. Nothing grand but she felt jubilant. She paused again to check his intentions. He was in no rush. He stood at the gap. She could not read the emotion just yet. She was keen to make the best of this opportunity. She took a few steps closer. She smiled and very softly said, “Hello, there” He stared right into her eyes. She loved eye contacts, special way to communicate, especially when someone had such mesmerising brown eyes. She did not stop smiling in case she would lose him. “How are you doing? Are you ok? I have never heard you in all these years!” she said almost in a whisper. He stood there, not flinching but listening and looking with interest. She quickly stopped whispering when she realised it was satisfying enough to just look at those balmy brown eyes. She stood like a statue this time. He sniffed and tried to squeeze his nose through the gap. He looked all the way up to the top of the fence, turned around, wagged his tail and walked away.

 

She always enjoyed spending time in her backyard, her Zen place. This secret friendship felt enticing. You either love dogs or you don’t. She was very fond of dogs but was far from having one of her own. So, she grew very fond very quickly of this bond that was growing through the gap in the fence, with her paw friend. Gentle whistles always did the trick. He would without fail fill the gap with his beautiful face. He would let out low pitched moans every time she spoke and he would always look up to the top of the fence gauging if it’s a leap he could make. These two acts specifically wrapped her in a warm blanket of loving fuzziness. She was now bold enough to go up close and pet his nose and offer him some biscuits he seemed to enjoy. He was Mr. Composed and Mr. Patient, virtues she was learning with great deal of effort and there he was being such a natural at it. He never showed desperation to grab the biscuit. He waited till she dropped it well into his side of the fence. He never asked for more, always seemed content with the two that was offered each time. She was wary of the owners catching him sniffing into her backyard. But for several weeks both were safe and forged a special and secretive relationship with ease. The stock of biscuits at home were dwindling faster than before yet she got away without anyone noticing. The meetings did not last more than five minutes but it was the most special part of her day. She felt plugged into life when she was with him. She used any excuse to go to the backyard.

One sunny day, she tip-toed to the backyard and stood well away from the gap in the fence to let the sun dry her wet hair. He could not have heard her come to the backyard since his owner was doing loud work which to her sounded like wood work. She could see the scaffolding still intact for a few months now around the back wall of the house. It looked like some interior renovations were underway. She was facing her back to the fence and stood there silently drying her hair, in her own world of thoughts. After about ten minutes, she turned around and a wide smile spread across her face like melting butter on a pan. He was there, sitting on his hind legs watching her all along just like the first time he stood there watching her whilst she was unaware, filling the gap yet again with his simple presence. She took note that this time she did not have to whistle. He seemed to know. She walked back inside to get ready for her daily hour-long walk, feeling somewhat special. Later in the evening, she went into the backyard to remove the clothes from the clothes line. She glanced through the gap and gasped. She felt a sinking feeling in her heart. Time seemed to freeze. She stood still, holding the clothes in her numb hands. A blanket of sorrow engulfed her.

The gap where she experienced stillness and love, where she learnt patience and composure, where she felt life, now she felt deep loss. The gap was covered by a brand new unpainted plank of wood. She wondered how he felt when his owner covered the gap. She headed back in with drooping shoulders, uncertain how long she would take to overcome this gaping gap that now stood like a statue in her heart.

Inner Engineering my path

Memories makes us. There are so many fragments of memories that are etched so deep in me that they lurk on the surface as light as a leaf that dances in thin air when the wind blows.

One such fragment is climbing trees. Reminiscing on all the trees that watched me grow is precisely when past memories flow into the current living moment.

This is also a classic example of how I am evolving in my spiritual journey, how I am exploring what spirituality means to me.

It means I am a little more curious than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more grateful than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more emotionally aware than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more lighter than I was yesterday

It means I am a little less judgemental than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more fearless than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more calmer than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more accepting of myself than I was yesterday

It means I am a little more responsible than I was yesterday

I walk past the same park every day, yet I feel so vibrant with joy during this walk - every single day. When the wind blows, I spread my hands as if I am flying. When the birds fly around, I spread my lips into a smile. When I see different paths, I am excited to walk them all and when I spot beautiful, magnificent trees, something stirs in me, maybe the very thing we call LIFE. When I get closer to one, my child like excitement from my childhood kicks in. My tree climbing memories spurs many urges. Because I am a little more fearless, a little more emotionally aware, a little more accepting of myself than I was yesterday, I follow the urge and hug the tree. In this embrace my spirit soars, my mind mutes, my heart heals, my soul is soothed.  I feel empty and full at the same time.

When I let go of the embrace, the doubts and fears translates to clarity and courage, contentment and happiness transcend sorrow and regret, self-loath shapes into self-love.  These moments when I feel touched by life, when I believe my own consciousness can create everyday magic, when I suddenly notice all the unwanted resistance I have built along the way and feel stunned by the harmony in the natural ease of life that is available to me and to everyone.. this is when I know the path I am on is the one I need to trust, the one that I need to pledge to and the one I will call spiritual because it is my own unique path that will open to me in ways I will allow and fathom, that I will learn to respect and accept, that will challenge and change me.

Three Capes Track

DAY 1

Finally I am on my way, in a flashy BMW (thanks to S) being driven towards airport for an onward journey to Hobart. My third visit to Tasmania. I should rather buy a yearly pass or something similar.

The sweetest voice of a little girl from right behind my seat kept me from napping during my flight. The flight was full, maybe because of school holidays.

    

~Port Arthur Historic Site~

At Hobart airport I enjoyed a cuppa whilst I waited to be picked up by Pennicott Wilderness Journey’s bus shuttle to Port Arthur. Sam arrives for the pick-up and offers to carry my bag into the bus and I delightfully hand it over. In the bus I meet Brianna, from US who has been travelling all over Australia since April. Good on her! Good 4 months of carrying her backpack and there I was happy to hand over mine to someone, mindful of carrying it for only 4 days!

Since we had ample time to get to the Pennicott cruise pick up point (that would drop us off at Denman’s Cove which is the start of the walk), Sam decided to show us a couple of look out points. Sam and Brianna chatted away. While I snapped away.

~When I go to bed, and struggle to sleep
I will play the sound of these waves, in my head
My favourite lullaby, from nature's shed~

We were then dropped off at the Port Arthur historic site where I met the other 6 walkers (So, just 7 people all up for the next few days! Perfect!). At the Historic site I spent a good 2 hours roaming around every part of the site and also did the 20 minute ferry ride. Perfect weather it seemed at the site.

But it turned a corner as soon as we hopped on the cruise. Light rain on a speed boat is as good as heavy rain. I had done this cruise during my first visit on a great weather day but also when there were quite some swells in the water which made our family sit at the very back of the boat for less impact. But this time, there were no swells despite winter time. Water was so still, and there I was thinking I was brave enough to sit at the front of the boat this time to enjoy the thrill of chopping on the waves!

The rain meant getting my rain wear out. I did not overdo my shopping after all. Looks like I would use all that I am painstakingly carrying. A bit out of rhythm walk today because of some poor decisions to carry two bags, one on front and one on back. But a short walk to our first nights’ stay at Surveyors.

~Denman's Cove~

~Surveyors Cabin~

DAY 2

Still getting used to this sweet silence all around, this cold and fresh air! My long date with nature, finally coming to life.

I wake up and head straight to the kitchen to turn on the only available heater. I place my legs right in front of the fire and let the warmth spread. No rain forecast for today. Phew!

The view from the kitchen at Surveyors is that of Cape Raoul. It was wet outside on the deck from the rain last night, else I could have enjoyed a cuppa outside. I keep to myself whilst the others make their breakfast.

No rush today. Walk from Surveyors to Munro is about 11k. At the very start of the walk, a wallaby greets me with a ‘No worries mate’ look. I smile and do my customary task – snap a picture!

Today’s viewing menu from Arthurs Peak has Mt Brown and Crescent Bay. Being on Telstra network I share my snaps straightaway with my folks and then remind myself it is connectivity to self that should be strongest wi-fi here!

Today being the first day, I keep thinking how far along the other hikers are and if I will catch up to them and whether I am too slow to reach the next cabin before sunset. But soon I get the hang of it. There is no other track really to get lost and based on my previous walking experiences I felt I should be fine time-wise. So, I jump straight back to my task – snapping pictures and tried something new, posing for pictures!

I stop for lunch at this story seat called ‘Love in the woods’ and wondered how many people got inspired by these words at this very spot :) Anyway, I eat my puliyogre in the woods. My lunch for all days! Chocolate block for dessert. Stomach is heavy, but the mind is light. The rest of the walk is uneventful, except I meet a couple of rangers on the way who were doing the rounds – checking for trash and other maintenance tasks.

At the cabin, for the rest of the night, I just lie down on the bench in front of my room and read until the sun sets and stops warming me, I chat with Paul for a bit, one of the walkers who has dipped himself in the Antarctic ocean. I also played board games and UNO with Paul and Suzanne.

The rangers usually come over and talk about the next day’s walk. I especially liked the ranger in this cabin, Nicko. Nicko got right into some sort of passionate character during his talk. He so reminded me of John Muir himself and also this boy Christopher McCandless, the vagabond hitch-hiker and the unfortunate camper of the now famous ‘The Magic Bus’.

Looking forward to more magic tomorrow.

DAY 3

  

~When I go to bed, and feel a slumber
The shine in his rise, I will remember~

The weather was unbelievably generous. A perfect cloudless blue sky with slight winds for the longest walk! I could leave my beastly backpack at Munro. This itself made me have a spring in my step. At Munro, the toilets are tucked away from the cabins but they are right next to the heli pad. So, owing to the weather I woke up early to watch the sunrise from here as this is the best spot for this ritual, at Munro. All morning rituals in one spot!

Sunrise was like business as usual for the sun. A neat spread of orange marmalade on the vast sea. Boundless beauty for eyes that are lucky to see and a heart that yearns for such simple joy.

Next up was another ritual that I wanted to experience. Showering in the open on a winter morning.Hot water and cold breeze. Shower is fun when it becomes a luxury.

This walk felt so easy. I especially liked the story seats. They are so cool and such a great idea to share snippets of history. I highly recommend reading the Encounters on the Edge booklet. Makes your walk all the more enjoyable and you will know what to look out for and when you find something from the book during the walk, I promise you will get excited, like a child on the cliffs with no one around to spoil the fun and no need to share the block of chocolate in the bag.

The more closer you get to The Blade, the more exciting you feel. So many spots to stop on the way to feel the awesomeness of the Tasman Sea and Island.

I have to mention the Rangers. They are so dedicated. Mostly young people who know where they belong! The Blade is beautiful, rugged, no railings or safety structures. Just sheer drops that offer sheer thrill. On good weather days the Rangers just enjoy a run from the cabin to the top of the Blade and back. Yup, half a marathon of trail running. Must be exhilarating more than exhausting!

At the Seal Spa, I am pretty sure I heard a seal from down below. No orcas or whales spotted unfortunately.

~Adrift but astute
Small, but significant~

I head back to Munro dizzy from heights but also happiness. With the backpack back on my back I walk the final few kilometres to Retakunna.

I was far from the faintest imagination of what was in store at Retakunna. After an early dinner, I stepped out of the warm kitchen cabin to make a call to folks back home and was just beginning to feel my hands go cold when I happened to look up to the sky and my jaw dropped at the sight of the most stunning night sky I have ever seen. The milky way just twinkling away silently. A cloudless sky but a star lit one!A few shooting stars and a million other bright stars all dazzling in their own glory. How blessed I felt! I simply lay flat on the deck bench, despite the cold and watched this spectacular show until I felt satisfied. The twinkle in the stars and the twinkle in my eyes surely matched.I literally thanked my stars this night!

DAY 4

~When I go to bed and I feel lost
    I will place my hand on my chest
      To feel the love I felt in these woods~

An early start today. A good 14k to the end of Cape Hauy and then to Fortescue Bay which marks the end of this walk. The weather was cloudy which I later realised was a blessing!

I have one word for today's walk - STEPS, lots of it! In to the woods, out the woods, up the cliffs, down the cliffs. The walk from cabin towards Mt. Fortesuce was uphill straight away. Lots of panting and water breaks. Chocolate, water, breathe, walk - repeat.

The walk through the rain forest has its own magic. So subtly enticing. Mainly ferns, mossy tree trunks and wind rustling through tall eucalyptus. The track just winds through the forests' simple charm like a welcome guest in their green territory.

~When I go to bed and feel very empty
I will walk every step, all over again, in my head,
until I feel full again!~

Finally I reached the half way mark and also the junction where you can leave your backpack and head to Cape Hauy with a day pack. 5 minutes into this walk I realised why they suggest leaving our back pack. S.T.E.P.S! But very soon I begin to see the views on either side. At the end of       this tough mudder walk is the reward - the Totem Pole and    Candlestick, standing strong and sturdy ready to give you    goose-bumps. Only, I also need to be strong and sturdy to  view them from the tip of Cape Hauy (there are safety    railings here).

On the way back I felt so overwhelmed, I turned around to face the view, popped my day pack to the side, went down on my knees, touched my forehead to the ground and kissed it. One humble heavy salutation,one gratitude heavy kiss to nature that never ceases to amaze me. I thanked everyone and everything for what I have experienced on this journey, in the last few days. The pain in my knees and shoulders felt insignificant. It was the precise 
moment when pain and pleasure said hello to each 
other through tears streaming down my cheeks.

I headed back to collect the backpack at the junction and nearly staggered my way to Fortescue Bay. This bit of the walk is open to general public, so you will see a few people on your way. A bit uneasy after a few days of hardly anybody. I got a bit annoyed heading back to civilization.

  

At Fortescue Bay I chilled my sore feet at the beach. Cold salty water on hot sweaty feet. Just what I needed. I placed my boots on the sand, facing the beach, clipped the TCT tag on it and snapped a precious picture, summing up my journey.

At the Pennicott office back at Hobart, while I sat waiting for my phone to charge (because it could not cope any longer with my frantic photo capturing), the guy that owns and runs these wilderness cruises (Rob) appeared with his pet dog, Chilli. He was kind enough to chat with me and check on how I went with the walk and then he let me pat Chilli. Chilli is 9 weeks old and kept licking Rob.

Tassie is small geographically but big on everything nature. I am guaranteed tears in Tassie, happy tears, every single visit.  

~When I go to bed, and feel very overwhelmed
I will picture this sea, and learn from how much she gives~

~Forever and for now, there is a sacred shrine waiting to be found
   Distant but dear, there is a beacon so bright, waiting to be held
Calm and collected, come closer, come alone 
        Alone is endearing, alone is enlightening . Alone is peace, alone is power 
Alone is clarity, alone is calm. Alone is trust, alone is truth ~

                   

Note to myself

Today is one of ‘those days’ when all I want to do is snuggle up in my own soft scarf, smell like myself, give a self-hug, feel the sunshine on my face, let the winter breeze spread through my skin and then, you know that train of thoughts that goes round and round, up and down, back and forth, in and out of your mind?

Yes, those crazy ones, just let those thoughts be, acknowledge them with a girly giggle, be mindful to not overdo complacency but yet kindle the fire within,

not despair to find my higher purpose but take the small steps needed to peel the layers of my inner calling,

not long for the imaginary life but lean on all the happy little things in the very now and just today,

not for once be troubled by others decisions and lives, but instead pinch the pride out of what I already have, my truest blessing, my everyday gift,

not for once doubt the power of love and kindness, but to gently grow it and give it,

not take my body for granted, but to pair it with a strong mind and together flaunt it like a magic lamp,

and to know that in all the years that lie ahead I will despite my learnings feel utterly lost, a little too helpless, torch bearer of pain and pity that nobody else can fathom because it is so mine and in the same berth as all the other good things. In the mammoth ship of life I am its captain. The voyage is not so much to cross the sea unscathed, but to dive within, knock on the doors of my soul and discover me, after all isn't this one’s greatest responsibility? 

Super Hero with Flower Power

With imminent wisdom accompanying my grey hair line, in all earnest and sincerity, all I wish for with closed eyes and an open heart is 'to love and to be loved'. Somehow, along the way, I slip away from the simplicity of this wishful statement and get unbeknowingly entangled in the complexity of its execution.

The power of a flower is so profound. When you are hurt, it can heal. When you are low, it can lift. When you feel lost, it can show you love. So, when a flower was being hand-picked and hand-delivered to me almost every day, it was love sitting right there on my kitchen bench top looking pretty and promising. That is when the clutter in the mind dispersed slightly and I was surprised at how simple it can actually be to express this feeling.

"Where do you get these lovely flowers, sweet heart?", I asked him, curious. "Oh, from the bushes", he shrugged and said. When he means bushes, he means somebody’s(or our own) bushy front yard on the path he takes to walk to school that is probably strewn with spring flowers. With so much innocence in his soul, he simply picks one for his mummy, every day, not knowing he is picking love and he is showing me how to love. 

Being loved makes you want to love. Loving makes you want to live. Wanting to live makes you happy. This is quite viciously unattainable to an immensely satisfactory degree on a daily basis. It feels like writing something on the murky beach sand that the waves relentlessly whisk away into the seas belly.

When he strokes my hair with his fingers, I am reminded to let go now

When he plants random kisses, I am reminded to smile more now

When he lies on my lap, I am reminded to calm down now

When he circles me with his arms, I am reminded to revive myself now

When he hides my stuff, I am reminded to lighten up now

When he just lives and grows around me, I am reminded to be grateful now

My deepest gratitude to my flower power super hero who reminds me to love, every day.





Update - 23/11/2016

One day my little man apparently offered a flower to the lovely lollipop lady at the school crossing. 

In return he was showered with more flowers. Surely, love beget more love.

Parallel Palace

That space in your head,

Where you parade yourself in places lush with imagination

Manifested by many unfulfilled musings

Some buried so deep, like the strong roots of a mighty old tree

Some bubbling like hot lava, each bubble hissing to be heard

Some that have untraceable psychological history, that is just as old as you

Some hopelessly and mostly unattainable, just like the thought of sleeping on a fluffy cloud

Some entangled, like a ferociously growing creeper, twisted and sturdy

Mostly, all of which are better inside than out

Better tamed inside, never let loose on the outside

Better understood inside, never judged on the outside

Better expressed inside, never explained on the outside

Better felt on the inside, never forced on the outside

Better respected on the inside, never reacted on the outside

That space in your head,

Where you build a life on the inside that runs in parallel to the one on the outside

Where you cherry pick people, in and out of the imaginative fragments  

Where you maneuverer events to match the drama of an aurora sky

Where you celebrate sensitivity amidst sincere stupidity but minus the social sympathy

Where you shield secrets that are unpretentiously sacred simply because they are unshared,unheard

This ghost ship space in the head,

Is where, what was never mine in reality's retrospect, what is not mine in reality’s present, what would  never be mine in realistic future is hauntingly but unmistakeably, unselfishly, warmly and fuzzily mine

This mystic space in the head,

Is where calm is, love is, lust is, regret is, respect is, kindness is, forgiveness is, fear is, strength is, courage is, happiness is…where soul is.

Betsy Bitsy Jar 2016

Another new year rolls by. However, there is a slight difference in how I am beginning to feel year after year. Hope this slight difference will bring massive change.

This slight shift in feeling is called panic. Haha, yup. A year wiser implies a year older. A year older implies a year closer. Closer to what? To the grave, of course! Haha.

So, ignited by implications I came up with an improvisation of this evergreen idea of a memory jar. How does this idea work (for me)?

Every month, starting from January I intend to do at least one thing (could be anything) that is new or that I have not done before and that makes me happy. Like really happy.

Finally, after more than three decades, I have harrowingly come to realise that its ok if all that matters is matters of me, matters in me, matters to me, matters by me.

This ‘me matters’ is actually tough (especially if you have never known how to do it). It’s responsibility towards self. It’s not selfish. It’s ‘soul’fish. Given that it’s me, it can well be ‘sole’fish too, haha.

January 2016

Where: Hammer Hall, Melbourne Arts Centre

What: Deadly 60 Live brought to us by the man himself – Steve Backshall

When: Jan 16^th

With: DS

Why: I confirm and confess I have a crush on this wildlife presenter, adventurer, naturalist and author. Thanks to my DS, I got hooked on to his show broadcast on BBC Earth. The places he travels to, the things he does, the animals he encounters, the love for nature’s wild side that he portrays is rudimentarily attractive. He apparently met everyone that came to one of his three shows in Melbourne. Surely that show was not the one we were in. Sob. Sob. Anyway, we continue watching his show. Latest one being ‘Deadly Pole to Pole’. DS pleaded to buy his books that were on sale that day. So contrary to pleading for junk food that I was absolutely delighted to oblige. Happy ending. But I am yet to grow fond of the author Steve. His writing style is very wordy. Surely not for a 6 year old.

February 2016

Where: Royal Melbourne Zoo

What: Sunset Series 3.6k Race

When: Feb 2^nd

With: DS
Why: Other than reading the thing I feel so delightful in doing is running. I have to and always will be thankful to my grandparents and dad for getting me on this path. There is so much to learn from running. About your mind, about your body and about your surroundings. If you allow, this sport can push you to your limits and beyond. It can be exhilarating. It gives you that sense of satisfaction and success in a sense that is so personal to you. So meaningful to you. So dear to you. It reminds me of my most cherished childhood memories that keeps reassuring me that the beauty in life is most certainly in all the simple things. With this staunch belief iand this burning desire to introduce this sport in the most subtle way I could to my son, I registered for this event. Zoo is ever enticing to a child. So running in the zoo sounds fun. For the animals, I mean. For a short while we humans running around were probably the animals version of Animal Planet or Nat Geo Wild. Haha. Nevertheless, the run was fun. My little man enjoyed it. He has pocketed his PB in his very first race. It was worth my efforts. Happy ending. Well, I hope and pray this is a happy beginning for him and his prospective running journey. Run. Sweat. Smile. Repeat. Just like that, Just Do It!

Where: Home and not so far away from home

What: Park and Movie

When: Feb 20^th 

With: DS

Why: Somehow being social is getting quite complicated in my opinion. Well, for this loneliness loving loner, being social is all the more overwhelming. So, moments of peaceful and relaxing time is something to mindfully plan and execute. Which is what I did. We drove to a nearby reserve area where we had never been before. Listened to the river flowing through a tunnel. Watched the afternoon sunshine shimmer on the flowing river. Plunged rocks into the water and captured some interesting slow motion videos. Listened to non-humans (thanks to the absence of humans). Natural venue. Nature’s music. Nature for company. My definition of a party. The party continued through the night in the safety haven of home. Nothing extravagant. A kids movie on telly. A happy kid. Some take away food. Cosy cuddles and dreamless sleep. Thus, this memory goes straight into the memory jar! Simply spread simplicity.

March 2016

Where: Indoor Pool

What: Swimming

When: March 5^th 

With: Myself

Why: Every time I see people swimming, I feel stranded. Living in Down Under and not knowing swimming just feels odd. So out of place. I am hydrophobic to some degree but time is ticking remember? It is time to drown my fears and drop my inhibitions and learn to swim, finally. My first lesson was this month. A long road to learning, but I have taken the plunge. Breathing is so involuntary, that it is almost always ignored until the minute your head is under water! I hope I do better than reducing the water level in the pool😃

Where: CBD

What: Blood Donation and Organ Donation Registration

When: March 24th 

With: Myself

Why: To say that I have donated for the first time is quite shocking. Nevertheless proud to be a few millilitres lighter (for a day). When the recipients of my father in law’s organs sent us letters professing their gratitude for giving them life, the magnanimity of this simple act was only then understood. Yes, we can value the power of our incredible bodies with such incredible deeds. If I can, you can too! If you want to lend a hand, start with lending an arm!

April 2016

Where: RJ Hamer Forest Arboretum

What: Hiking/Bush Walking

When: April 9^th  

With: A bunch of lovely strangers

Why: That yearning, that longing I feel all the time which is almost always bubbling on the surface ready to explode, finally found a getaway albeit for a short time. I cannot remember the last time a smile lingered on my face spreading from ear to ear for so long and so unhesitatingly. I flaunted my desperation to hike by randomly choosing a walking club off the Internet and zeroing in on this particular hike. I will hence forth encourage myself to be so desperately random, desperately daring to do what I sincerely desire. Time is ticking, remember? I met a bunch of ladies who hike full time. Dear me, here I am, having a full time desk job with only a rotating chair to keep me excited. I felt envious of these lovely ladies but also inspired. The oldest lady hiking that day was 82! I have some serious hope for retirement age. Being in the woods felt like being in my skin. I always assumed this was how I would feel amidst nature. I am glad this hike proved it to me. It did take some effort to ward off the guilty feeling of leaving my boys back home. But I know I have never had it all in my life and neither will I. If I need something I have to let go of something else. The only issue now is I want to do it so much more often. Oh dear! The longing is only rejuvenated…..

When: 21^st May 2016

Where: Home

What: Girls Night

Who: Group of Girl Friends

This took like for ever to happen. So, when it happened it was worth entering my Betsy Bitsy Jar for this year. I am glad all the girls turned up despite their home commitments. Nibbles, drinks, dinner and lots of talking. This was what the night was all about. Personally, at the end of the night it made me realise what a long way I have come ever since I set foot in this country. How much I have learnt, how much I have grown, though nobody would ever know the true measure except myself. As a token of this nice night, I had handmade book marks for each of the ladies for them to take home in which I wrote a small poem (about the good things I see in them) for each of them. We always feel chuffed hearing good things about ourselves, isn't it? I have always felt that we hardly are appreciative of each other and I wanted to make an effort to make them smile. 

When: June 2016

What: Reading

Who: Thyself

I never imagined learning more than one language during school days would be so precious years later. I am so grateful that I can read and write in my native language. When you are so far away from all the things familiar to you in your growing up days and the world you currently live in is nowhere close, your best bet to be transported back in time and place, is the language. It becomes the chord that connects you to past familiarity. But it took me so many years to pick up a Kannada book to read. So, this was the precise opportunity to double the joy. Read….in my native language. Kannada being one among the oldest languages in the world, with a sense of pride I took to reading a collection of short stories written in Kannada. I was on a slow pace to start with but I surely slipped into a rhythm that soon saw me finish the book. Next thing is to add more Kannada books to my mini library.

When: July 2016
What: Running
Who: DS and Myself
My soul feeds on my pacing legs, it seems. Somehow, magically, running soothes through sweat. With no training beforehand but with just the excitement of running, I registered DS and myself for RM2016, the difference being that this was a back to back race for me. More the merrier. A weekend of running and weekdays of soreness. What is pleasure without pain?